Let’s set the scene; five of my favorite Tilteed shirts have snuck out and decided to have a t-party and talk about what ever it is t-shirts talk about in their spare time. Shall we eavesdrop?
Cast:
Pinkerton as Pinky
Super Featherweight Champion as FC
Pirate Dragon as Drags
Monsterous as Monsterous
Look on the Brightside as Brighteyes
(Tea cups are passed around, Brighteyes pours all at once, Pinky has strung up a tightrope and is precariously balanced on it)
BRIGHTEYES:
Why don’t you come down and join us, Pinky?
PINKY:
No thank you, I’ll just listen to the conversation. Hey, what’s the champ doing?
(FC is staring at the swaying rope longingly, and crouches down; Brighteyes casually hooks a tentacle around FC’s tail, just in case.)
DRAGS:
So when are the photographers coming? I only agreed to come because my agent said this would be good publicity, two of us together equals fan crossover.
MONSTEROUS:
TEA!TEA!teaTeaTEAteateateaTEA!eat!TEA!TEA!TEA!TEA!tea?
(FC’s attention is drawn by the high squeally noises and movements, he starts staring at the mini monsters as they bounce off the shirt. Brighteyes is drinking her tea and someone else’s while exuding a great sense of calm and composure)
BRIGHTEYES:
So you’re writing another book. About your travels, I assume. Just brush the little monsters off and don’t let them jump in the tea. They start to dissolve after a few minutes.
(FC has started creeping up on the bounciest mini monster and swipes it with a claw, missing as the monster jumps to the side, tea cups clatter, mini monsters scatter)
MONSTEROUS:
Hiss!HISS!hiss!TEA!tea!tea.tea?BOO.donut!!!!!!!!
(FC is chasing the mini monster around the table, everything is falling to the ground, Pinkerton is humming and quite casually stretching a leg out to the side while raising an arm. Another mini monster, we’ll call it Herbina, crawls up on the rope with astonishing speed, then looks down, composing itself for a dive into a tea cup)
DRAGS:
So, Brighteyes, how is your book tour going?
BRIGHTEYES:
Well, the people are very grateful. I do so much better out of the sun that I’ve scheduled traditionally rainy locations. Fans have liked having an excuse to get out.
DRAGS:
I’m going to focus on the East Coast, I think, starting in Key West and breaking in Delaware. There’s some nice smuggling caves there. I may be able to dig out treasure.
PINKERTON:
Beware of maps. And sychophants. And skies with wild and purple eyes.
DRAGS:
(raises tea cup in salute)
Ta, Pinky.
MONSTEROUS:
TEA!BAD!BAD!HOT!BOUNCE!BACON!tea?kitty.SCONE.SCRAM!!!.
(FC has grabbed the bouncy little monster finally, turns it around to look at—let’s call it Binty, and then pops it in his mouth. Binty crunches a little. FC nods at Drags. Drags considers, then quickly grabs another mini monster (who may or may not be known as Red Angus) and dips it in his tea before popping it in his mouth.)
DRAGS:
Marshmallow chewy. But crunchy.
(Brighteyes puts down both of her tea cups with a bit of a dangerous twitch in ALL of her tentacles.)
MONSTEROUS:
TEA!TEA!tea!medic!!!!!!!TEA!mommy?JUMP!panCaKes!Tea!chewychewyooey!HELP!
(And the lights on the scene go down as Brighteyes’ tentacles pry apart Drags’ jaws in an effort to rescue Red Angus, Pinky begins a slow fall after overbalancing as he shakes an admonitory finger at FC, who is cleaning his face w/ his golden paws as a green rain starts to fall.)
